The Santa Claus Document
By Dale Urbanowicz
For hundreds of years, the story of Santa Claus and his reindeer have endeared many people the world over. Parents and children alike have loved the story. But for all my cognitive years, I have had trouble accepting some parts of the story. You see, as I grew older and wiser, I started doubting some of the storylines. For instance, I questioned how was it that Santa could put all those gifts of all the children of the world into that tiny sleigh? Why, the weight of the gifts alone would crush the sleigh to pulp! Or, how can a reindeer fly? Questions like that, and others, bothered me no end. I needed answers. So, in my search for the answers to my questions, I would probe my parents to explain to me just how could Santa Claus do things that ordinary people like you and me could not do? Like slide down chimneys without getting dirty? But alas, my curiosity was never quelled by their feeble answers . So I was left to myself to find my own answers, or forever go unsatisfied in life This is why, with great relief, I was informed of a certain document that was being kept by the NorthPole Times that contained the answers to all my boyhood questions, regarding this jolly old, red suited elf I cannot reveal my source of information, so don't ask for names. Suffice it to say that the information was true, and I was able to get hold of this paper. So now, with permission from all parties involved, I pass on to you, the world, the information you need to answer the tough questions that YOUR children will be asking of you. Now without further delay, reprinted in its entirety, is the interview of "Santa Claus" and "Zeke" the North Pole Times reporter.